CHAD PENNINGTON: HE IS NOT MY BROTHER!

MIAMI- Dolphins quarterback Chad Pennington has had his share of frustrations since starting in the NFL, but none so worrisome as having to repeatedly deny he is the younger brother of Ty Pennington, host of ABC’s Extreme Makeover: Home Edition.

“I like what he does. I like that he helps people. I really have nothing against him, but we are not related, and by gosh, I did not get any hand me downs from that dude,” Pennington insisted to a group of media assembled at Dolphin Stadium.

The exasperated quarterback said he was tired of fans approaching him, and congratulating him on ‘the show’. He said he has never helped anyone with kitchen remodelling, and wouldn’t even know how to add another floor to a house. He also confessed he was tired of autographing Sears Craftsman tools.

“I want people to know who I am. I’m a touchdown machine, not a feel good carpenter. I don’t own many tools, I don’t fix homes, and I don’t hold designers in my arms while they cry about how meaningful their work is,” the defensive Pennington said. “If I was that guy’s brother don’t you think I would be making more smug contractor jokes? I don’t even wear denim. I mean c’mon.”

Some reporters in the throng seemed skeptical of Chad, a few holding out circular saws, and wood planars they intended the Dolphin quarterback to sign. Sensing he wasn’t making his case the oft dropped fantasy quarterback headed for the locker room.

“Chad’s having a tough time with this,” said coach Tony Sparano. “But I have to say, I wish Chad would make my son a wheelbarrow. He’s always wanted one.”

Ty Pennington still insists that Chad is his brother.