Braylon Edwards Tries To Punch Self In Face

CLEVELAND- In a brief locker room tirade in which teammates had to restrain his right fist from landing in his face, Braylon Edwards lashed out at himself for all the dropped passes which have cost the Browns this season, and contributed mightily to the Browns’ poor start.

“You are not better than the team, Edwards. You need to catch the goofy friggin ball, you fool,” said the slippery handed wide receiver. “Catch it!”

He began his rant while onlooking teammates and reporters wondered who Edwards was shouting at. Eyewitnesses said Braylon’s eyes looked glazed over like they do when he tries to catch a football, and his screaming was annoying those taking showers.

“Yeah, that’s right superstar,” Edwards shouted, “I’m talking to you! Don’t you turn your back on me.”

Edwards spun himself around, and just before he was able to hit himself in the face, teammate Robaire Smith, stopped his hand from touching Edwards cheek. Running back Jamal Lewis lent a hand as well.

“Yeah, that’s right you punk ass. I’m gonna hit you hard if you don’t get it right on Sunday. Punk ass fool!” Edwards shouted in a vertigo-like haze.

At last report, Edwards was trying to trip himself on the way to his car while screaming at himself.

Fellow Browns receiver Syndric Steptoe said, “We all just hope Braylon can pull himself together before the game on Sunday. The Jacksonville pass defense can be tough at times, and we need all the concentration we can get. Frustration doesn’t help the team. But then again, it might help me, he he.”

Submitted by DH
Photo Courtesy Icon SMI