Tony Gonzalez Suspended As Video Resurfaces

KANSAS CITY, KS- Tony Gonzales, star tight end of the Kansas City Chiefs was suspended by the NFL today after the video below resurfaced after months of no one looking at it. Roger Goodell, commissioner of the NFL said Gonzales’ performance in the SciFi channel show A.I. Assault, first airing in 2007, was typical ‘football player acting’, and didn’t represent the NFL, Gonzalez, or the Kansas City Chiefs well.

Gonzalez is very well liked by fans and coaches alike, but that didn’t matter to Goodell who said, “Long gone are the days of Mike Ditka, Terry Bradshaw, and Brett Favre just showing up on set. I want to see a real performance from Gonzalez, darn it. I know he’s capable of it. Just getting by saying lines without infusing real emotional grit isn’t going to cut it. I expect more from a pro like him. I mean Tony plays opposite George Takei of Star Trek fame, and he just mails it in? I couldn’t believe it.”

Several teammates disagreed saying they thought Gonzales’ onscreen portrayal of an airplane co-pilot being attacked by a spider like replicant was very realistic.

“When he was shooting his gun it sure looked like he was angry. I actually got scared,” said Gonzales’ longtime friend and teammate running back Larry Johnson. “Personally I think George Takei was the one who looked silly when he reacted to the murderous creature, not Tony.”

But Goodell disagreed.

“The part when the long robotic arachnid-like arm creature choked Gonzales at the door of the cockpit was completely unbelievable! I mean c’mon if Gonzales had given it something a little bit more - a scream, even an aargh I would have been far more impressed, and this unfortunate performance probably wouldn’t have resulted in his four game suspension.”

Gonzales’ agent was not available for comment.